14:22 SATURDAY 13 JANUARY 2007

Sarah just shot through her South Park character. Otherwise? The baby was AWED by the local indoor swimming pool - a veritable palace of blue water and glass - and Alexander and I have been enthralled by Steve Barron's Arabian Nights (O, for John Leguizamo's superlative djinn ...). And this is extremely funny.

14:23 WEDNESDAY 10 JANUARY 2007

Alexander and I had some kind of plain old pasta with parmesan for dinner last night. And the baby? Homemade organic chicken broth with shredded chicken and cous cous followed by shredded organic eye fillet, lactose-free apricot yoghurt, fresh banana and cherries from her mother's mouth.

08:21 MONDAY 8 JANUARY 2007

New section uploaded, in however inchoate a form. Today is lazy or lazier, not sure which yet. This week we hit the zoo or the aquarium with the baby, have yet to decide. (Such indolence in conjunction with vacillation is heavenly.) Last night was a blast: tight tight Worms 2 matches with Alexander, who won them all but was looking a little nervous at the end. And the baby has developed a passion for Bette Midler, whose Cool Yule CD has her swaying her hips and headbanging.

08:53 SUNDAY 7 JANUARY 2007

One of those bared eyetooth shopping moments: I want the Madeline classic dolls' house for the baby! (Who, incidentally, is off the scales for height and weight in her age group; they estimate that she - currently sitting on the floor with a metal colander on her head - will be over six feet tall as an adult.) Otherwise? Alexander and I are having a Renee-Zellweger-as-Bridget-Jones moment. Too much homemade chocolate fudge cake will do that to a happily married couple. (This holiday thing, I could do it on a regular basis.) Readers wondering what to devour should immediately make their way to the nearest online bookstore to buy this.

00:50 SATURDAY 6 JANUARY 2007

New critique in today's Weekend Australian. And this is very funny.

08:04 MONDAY 1 JANUARY 2007

Alexander strolled up to see the outrageous fireworks last night, but I remained home as I was mindful of the baby's capacity for processing the War-of-the-Worlds skyscape. NYE itself has never been a big deal in my life; I've always experienced it as a peaceful, uninteresting event. The new year's significance, on the other hand, is potent.

09:21 SUNDAY 31 DECEMBER 2006

New Year's Eve, and what an extraordinary, blissful, perfect year - the finest of my life so far, and replete with joy. Chocolate cakes are baking in our (crappy old) oven, the baby is reading an upsidedown book in her pen, and we will be taking a stroll this afternoon as we review the year. Happy New Year, readers, and may the coming twelve months bring you both happiness and serenity.

07:50 SATURDAY 30 DECEMBER 2006

Roy, Suzanne and Violet over yesterday; Stephen and Shareen over today. Otherwise recovering from an inordinately social and festive week. New critique in today's Weekend Australian.

10:29 FRIDAY 29 DECEMBER 2006

Brad's take on our baby's birthday party: "You were in the kitchen baking, Alex was out in the lounge alternating picking up Bethesda, and talking to as many of the guests as he could get to in turn, passing Bethesda to each of the women who would put their arms out for her at each opportunity when they thought, 'OK, he's had her long enough, my turn!'. You came out of the kitchen looking a trifle (apologies for baking-related pun) harassed and still took the time and found pleasure in giving me a guided tour of the apartment and showing me Bethesda's things before throwing yourself back into the kitchen. Alex continued to juggle conversations with Giorgio on a Polish war cemetery in Italy, Mabel on his working from home for The Guardian and me on reincarnation - amongst other things - and fulfilled his role of keeping an eye on Bethesda as she rolled around the floor determined to beat the restraining confines of her party dress (pretty as it was) ... Yep, family."

08:50 TUESDAY 26 DECEMBER 2006

Our baby's first birthday. Awoke singing her happy birthday and then she was presented with her rag doll, which she loves. Alexander busy getting the place presentable while a rich chocolate cake in the shape of a rose slowly bakes in our crappy old oven. Otherwise? Christmas was beautiful - a significant haul - and we're both anticipating a few long weeks of idleness. MERRY CHRISTMAS!

08:45 SATURDAY 23 DECEMBER 2006

New critique in today's Weekend Australian (and the one after that, and the one after that). Otherwise? New review uploaded in NONFICTION.

14:34 THURSDAY 21 DECEMBER 2006

A perfect morning. On holiday (in a manner of speaking; I'm still working on a book) and no longer bug-eyed over deadlines, I made gingerbread men (the baby intently watching) as Alexander enjoyed a well-deserved late sleep. The whole place is now fragrant with baking smells. A huge box was then delivered - outrageously gorgeous Scandinavian cake tins in the shape of roses and castles and Christmas wreaths and hearts, Nigella Lawson cookie cutters, new mugs, Peter Rabbit paraphernalia for the baby, gifts for the sibling who goes into production next year, and sundry other beautiful items (cake plate and dome, porcelain citrus juicer, silver serving spoons, cake knife, et cetera). We're going all out for Christmas and the baby's first birthday party on Boxing Day (no other babies allowed; she will instead nibble on rose-shaped chocolate cupcakes and be serenaded by lawyers and professors and neo-grandparents and the translator of Nobel Prize-winning works, whereupon she will be presented with a 60th anniversary Madeline rag doll; the main haul is on Christmas Day). What an extraordinary year it has been, so physically demanding and such a source of bliss. Banal note: Alexander and I hope and pray that Jason Turner of Footballers' Wives marries Jackie of the Malboro Mutter. Please. Marry her, Jason.

08:54 MONDAY 18 DECEMBER 2006

From Laura in London:

VARIOUS PORTENTS
by Alice Oswald

Various stars. Various kings.
Various sunsets, signs, cursory insights.

Many minute attentions, many knowledgeable watchers,
Much cold, much overbearing darkness.

Various long midwinter Glooms.
Various Solitary and Terrible stars.
Many Frosty Nights, many previously Unseen Sky-flowers.
Many people setting out (some of them kings) all clutching at stars.

More than one North star, more than one South star.
Several billion elliptical galaxies, bubble nebulae, binary systems.
Various dust lanes, various routes through varying thickness of Dark,
Many tunnels into deep space, minds going back and forth.

Many visions, many digitally enhanced heavens,
All kinds of glistenings being gathered into telescopes:
Fireworks, gasworks, white-streaked works of Dusk,
Works of wonder and or water, snowflakes, stars of frost …

Various dazed astronomers dilating their eyes,
Various astronauts setting out into laughterless earthlessness,
Various 5,000-year-old moon maps,
Various blindmen feeling across the heavens in Braille.

Various gods making beautiful works in bronze,
Brooches, crowns, triangles, cups and chains,
Various crucifixes, all sorts of nightsky necklaces.
Many Wise Men remarking the irregular weather.

Many exile energies, many low-voiced followers,
Watchers of whisps of various glowing spindles,
Soothsayers, hunters in the High Country of the Zodiac,
Seafarers tossing, tied to a star…

Various people coming home (some of them kings). Various headlights.

Two or three children standing or sitting on the low wall.
Various winds, the Sea Wind, the sound-laden Winds of Evening
Blowing the stars towards them, bringing snow.

09:02 SUNDAY 17 DECEMBER 2006

The weather has cleared, thank God. Clear morning sunlight through the leaves, etc. The baby now dances in her playpen, swinging her hips like a hula dancer, as I work on a critique, three essays, and a book proposal beside her in an armchair. Alexander is exultant after interviewing his hero, and also beginning to design. Otherwise? Gearing up for the best - and first family - Christmas of our lives. The place is full of tinsel and fairylights and gingerbread and gifts wrapped in gold tissue paper. Magic.

11:26 THURSDAY 14 DECEMBER 2006

TOUCHED BY AN ANGEL

Maya Angelou

We, unaccustomed to courage
exiles from delight
live coiled in shells of loneliness
until love leaves its high holy temple
and comes into our sight
to liberate us into life.

Love arrives
and in its train come ecstasies
old memories of pleasure
ancient histories of pain.
Yet if we are bold,
love strikes away the chains of fear
from our souls.

We are weaned from our timidity
In the flush of love's light
we dare be brave
And suddenly we see
that love costs all we are
and will ever be.
Yet it is only love
which sets us free.

12:21 SUNDAY 10 DECEMBER 2006

Picnic at Balmoral yesterday with Kate, Travis, Angus, Marinda, Lucy, Michelle, Grace, Jo, Finn, and others. We walked uphill back through Mosman, a gorgeous exertion. Inexplicably, the baby now calls me "Mimi," which I love.

16:04 WEDNESDAY 6 DECEMBER 2006

The baby danced for the first time today: a milestone.

12:23 MONDAY 4 DECEMBER 2006

My 4000-word essay on cyberporn is in the new issue of Men's Style, on the stands now.

07:57 SUNDAY 3 DECEMBER 2006

We sobbed like children at Nate's death in the last series of Six Feet Under (ridiculous, I know, but we had grown so fond of the character). Otherwise? Quiet cool wet weather, I finished one critique last night and am starting on another, and Alexander is in the thick of a feature story. That and wrapping presents. That and spending hundreds on toys and Amazon and - oh, everything delicious.

08:04 FRIDAY 1 DECEMBER 2006

Our embroidered Christmas stockings, fairy lights, and Christmas tree went up last night - fiber optic, natch, but so very pretty in the darkness - with a trove of gifts underneath. (This is our first Christmas as a family, and we are inordinately excited.) Otherwise? I lunch with an editor today, and my darling husband Alexander interviewed the guest of honor at an international academic forum on game design for The Guardian. An outstanding success.

16:44 WEDNESDAY 29 NOVEMBER 2006

Two critical links for parents of daycare children, or friends of those considering daycare for their children. Please pass these links on to as many people as you can: Daycare 1 and Daycare 2.

13:44 SUNDAY 26 NOVEMBER 2006

Our baby has a shockingly sophisticated palate. Her favorite foods? Organic beef followed by pink grapefruit. Tori, Holly and Willem up from Melbourne on Friday for David's new exhibition. Otherwise? Both overwhelmed by commissions and preparing for the party.

11:16 THURSDAY 23 NOVEMBER 2006

This morning was beautiful. Spent half an hour blowing bubbles at Bethesda as the sunlight poured in through the window; she laughed with the purest delight. Otherwise? Yoga was superb, I'm working on another critique, and Alexander is now obsessed by natural cleaning products.

14:22 TUESDAY 21 NOVEMBER 2006

*DOMESTIC NEWSFLASH* My brilliant eco-warrior husband Alexander discovered that bicarbonate of soda (aka baking soda or sodium bicarbonate) and white vinegar are more effective than any commercial oven cleaner if left to soak in the oven overnight. After studying the potential side-effects of commercial cleaners (third degree burns, blindness, temporary infertility, death), he sought a safer method and found it. What a star. Otherwise? He's just filed a major feature, I've just filed a major essay, and life is good.

09:21 SATURDAY 18 NOVEMBER 2006

Over the moon. My gorgeous cousin Alice has just been cast as Wendy in the national Italian production of Peter Pan, our paper wedding anniversary takes place tomorrow, and next week (drumroll) I resume yoga. Bliss. Bliss. Bliss.

13:20 THURSDAY 16 NOVEMBER 2006

Excited about Sunday's celebrations. December will be a month of festivities - gifts and wrapping paper secreted about the house - and much cooking. Otherwise? Completing a nice fat essay and two critiques, and also tackling the issue of postpartum aesthetics with a personal trainer.

1:03 MONDAY 13 NOVEMBER 2006

I'm up late ironing Tibetan prayer flags for the living room while my husband sneaks around organizing our first wedding anniversary.

08:25 SATURDAY 11 NOVEMBER 2006

On Thursday night, I shuddered through the worst brain-rocking fever of my adult life. Otherwise? Alexander is roaring through yet another feature, and this was published in The Weekend Australian today.

08:32 THURSDAY 9 NOVEMBER 2006

Gradually clambering out of the swamp with the help of Alexander. Otherwise? My first column on mothering Bethesda is in this month's My Child magazine, on the stands now (as the shot was taken by my husband without makeup and during a heatwave, I look like a melting waxwork of Punch).

00:29 WEDNESDAY 8 NOVEMBER 2006

Hellacious illness, domestic chaos.

08:45 THURSDAY 2 NOVEMBER 2006

When asked whether he has a writing ritual, British author William Leith sums the process up perfectly: "Yes, I do have rituals. Actually, I wouldn't quite use the word ‘ritual'. I spend a lot of time wandering around, lost in thought. I wander around, and sit in cafes, and read books and magazines, and jot down notes in the margins, and transfer the notes onto pieces of paper. And then I spend a lot of time thinking that there must be something interesting at the back of my mind, if only I could somehow pinpoint it, or even just see it fleetingly. And then there are endless false dawns. Yes! I've got it! It's all about, um…and I lose the thread. There is a lot of despair, laced with moments of almost religious faith, and then, finally, a mad scramble as my thoughts tumble out."

14:32 WEDNESDAY 1 NOVEMBER 2006

New mothers everywhere beware, beware (please pass this on to every new parent you know).

10:56 SUNDAY 29 OCTOBER 2006

Today is Alexander's birthday. A wonderful morning. And here he is with his very favorite present:

11:00 TUESDAY 24 OCTOBER 2006

Light of my life, fire of my loins ... and the little bubby:

08:35 MONDAY 23 OCTOBER 2006

*NEWSFLASH* Wee Willem Bromley was born tonight in Melbourne; his parents are over the moon. Otherwise? Welcome to Australia, Land of the Long White Hick: "The husband of federal Sex Discrimination Commissioner and new Liberal Party recruit Pru Goward is in trouble over remarks about Aboriginal women. David Barnett is under investigation by the Human Rights and Equal Opportunities Commission for 'degrading' comments he wrote in a Canberra newspaper. The former adviser to Prime Minister John Howard has refused to apologise and could face possible court action. In the article, Mr Barnett said Aboriginal women 'wipe themselves with a rag in the lavatory, and hang it up to dry for next time. We must ask ourselves whether it is right to condemn Australian children to be brought up ... by mothers who don't know enough about rearing children to wipe their noses and where the baby bonus sends a town on a drunken binge.'” Hate crimes and a G&T, anyone?

08:06 FRIDAY 20 OCTOBER 2006

Three beautiful emails from readers - NH, whose words made me cry; a charming note from a Finnish reader; and then there was JJ, who wrote: "I love your reviews, by the way. One you did on Penelope Green's adventures in Italy was the only book review in the past few years to make me blow tea out of my nose." Critique in tomorrow's Weekend Australian ... I think. And this is out next year.

12:18 THURSDAY 19 OCTOBER 2006

Today is the anniversary of my brother's suicide.

10:20 MONDAY 16 OCTOBER 2006

Words I thought I would never articulate: "Don't put your feet on my head after you've been standing on egg." Otherwise? A blissful weekend. Filed critique. Return of the Jedi powerful. Read when I could. And ate croissants with Alexander on Sunday. Happier than I have ever been in my life.

10:27 FRIDAY 13 OCTOBER 2006

Suspect I have a critique in tomorrow's Weekend Australian. Otherwise? Alexander has come out of his hard drive coma and is very patiently rewriting each lost piece, I am about to file another column and then launch into a new critique, the weather is spectacular, and we are very much looking forward to our vacation in December. Oh, and I bought B another Christmas present. Utterly irresistible.

21:03 TUESDAY 10 OCTOBER 2006

Alexander's hard drive died, taking six features down with it. He is still in shock.

22:43 SUNDAY 8 OCTOBER 2006

The happiest of days. Yesterday we watched The Empire Strikes Back - I had forgotten how wonderful the Star Wars series can be - and today we all went for a long walk. Beautiful B is busy formulating words, I am reading, and Alexander is tearing through features.

10:06 SATURDAY 7 OCTOBER 2006

Attention all powerful single women: potentially fabulous husband material here. (I've got mine.) Nothing like a man who loves children - and not in a Michael Jackson kind of way, either.

00:00 WEDNESDAY 4 OCTOBER 2006

"Rachel Ragg, a former Leeds University lecturer and mother of two, points out that almost 400,000 children were last year prescribed Ritalin, a drug almost unknown in Britain in the early 1990s. [She] argues that this is symptomatic of a sudden and dangerous crisis facing our next generation. Mrs Ragg said: 'Childhood is no longer childhood for the vast majority of children and I think this Government has been absolutely appalling to children. They have provided financial incentives to parents to go back to work, and pressurised them to send children to nurseries by implying that their children will be economically, academically and culturally disadvantaged if they aren't in a nursery by the age of two. In fact, all evidence suggests this is the reverse of the truth. It may very well be that ADHD [attention deficit hyperactivity disorder] stems from a culture in which young children are stuck in nurseries listening to lectures about diversity when they should be out splashing in puddles and climbing trees.' [Zac] Goldsmith said yesterday ... 'We've arrived at a point where childhood, and all things that go with it, are inconvenient, with the natural impulses of children increasingly diagnosed as inappropriate once they enter a nursery or school environment.'" Excellent stuff. Otherwise? B has started making random Klingon faces, which is very funny.

21:34 MONDAY 2 OCTOBER 2006

New piece uploaded. Otherwise? A very funny time in the park with our bright red Gertie ball.

10:27 TUESDAY 26 SEPTEMBER 2006

"The heir to one of Kenya's most famous British settler families shot dead a black poacher as an act of revenge, according to opening statements in a trial that has re-ignited old, colonial grievances," reported London's Daily Mail. "Old Etonian Thomas Cholmondeley - 38-year-old descendant of the third Lord Delamere, one of the original white settlers in Kenya - has pleaded not guilty to the murder of Robert Njoya, a local stonemason he accuses of hunting animals on his land ... Keriako Tobiko, director of public prosecutions, said he would show that Njoya was shot by a high-powered hunting rifle as he fled from Cholmondeley. 'We shall prove that the accused attacked the deceased and his companions as a retaliation or revenge for trespassing and poaching on his land,' he said. Cholmondeley was arrested in May, nearly a year after prosecutors dropped charges against him for killing a wildlife ranger. Then, he admitted shooting Samson ole Sisina, but denied murder, saying he thought Sisina was an armed robber. His acquittal on that charge sparked a rash of protests that a post-colonial elite was afforded special privileges. This time he admits shooting Njoya but says the killing was accident, as he aimed for the poacher's dogs." I urge you to email Mwai Kibaki, the Kenyan President -  president@statehousekenya.go.ke, and Martha Karua, the Kenyan Minister of Justice, care of Kenyan Section of the International Commission of Jurists -  info@icj-kenya.org, and the International Criminal Court - pio@icc-cpi.int - asap with your opinions regarding this matter.

17:01 SUNDAY 24 SEPTEMBER 2006

A blisteringly hot day: midsummer in the guise of spring. Alexander is in a jolly mood and completing a major feature; I feel like frogspawn after too little sleep. From a recent piece:

08:12 SATURDAY 23 SEPTEMBER 2006

Happy 37th birthday, Gianluca! Otherwise? It's a ravishing day, Oriana Fallaci is dead, we're watching Merlin, and for my piece on corporate snakes, click here.

09:37 WEDNESDAY 20 SEPTEMBER 2006

Alexander arranged to have long-stemmed red roses delivered yesterday (magic); dinner was the finest Chinese - again, delivered - by something like candlelight. And another surprise awaits me. Otherwise? Critique in this Saturday's Weekend Australian, Alexander has - amazingly - permanently impacted on the established order of an established magazine, and today - today, today! - I do absolutely nothing other than bathe in white clay and read magazines to celebrate yesterday's birthday, which was otherwise frantic.

00:02 TUESDAY 19 SEPTEMBER 2006

Today is my birthday, yes =)

08:04 FRIDAY 15 SEPTEMBER 2006

The late Nan Kempner on Yves Saint Laurent: “He taught me a very important thing: All a woman needs is a good trench coat, a pair of black pants, a long black skirt, a short black skirt, and lots of tops.” Otherwise? Music class with B. Filed another critique, a 4000-word essay, and my first column. (Another column in the wings.) And Alexander (superhero) has just interviewed two superstars of their field.

08:04 WEDNESDAY 13 SEPTEMBER 2006

From Alice Miller's groundbreaking book, For Your Own Good: Hidden Cruelty in Child-Rearing and the Roots of Violence: "In the following pages I shall apply the term 'poisonous pedagogy' to this very complex endeavor. It will be clear from the context in question which of its many facets I am emphasizing at the moment. The specific facets can be derived directly from the preceding quotations from child-rearing manuals. These passages teach us that:

  1. Adults are the masters (not the servants!) of the dependent child.
  2. They determine in godlike fashion what is right and what is wrong.
  3. The child is held responsible for their anger.
  4. The parents must always be shielded.
  5. The child's life-affirming feelings pose a threat to the autocratic adult.
  6. The child's will must be 'broken' as soon as possible.
  7. All this must happen at a very early age, so the child 'won't notice' and will therefore not be able to expose the adults.

"The methods that can be used to suppress vital spontaneity in the child are: laying traps, lying, duplicity, subterfuge, manipulation, 'scare' tactics, withdrawal of love, isolation, distrust, humiliating and disgracing the child, scorn, ridicule, and coercion even to the point of torture.

"It is also a part of 'poisonous pedagogy' to impart to the child from the beginning false information and beliefs that have been passed on from generation to generation and dutifully accepted by the young even though they are not only unproven but are demonstrably false. Examples of such beliefs are:

  1. A feeling of duty produces love.
  2. Hatred can be done away with by forbidding it.
  3. Parents deserve respect simply because they are parents.
  4. Children are undeserving of respect simply because they are children.
  5. Obedience makes a child strong.
  6. A high degree of self-esteem is harmful.
  7. A low degree of self-esteem makes a person altruistic.
  8. Tenderness (doting) is harmful.
  9. Responding to a child's needs is wrong.
10. Severity and coldness are a good preparation for life.
11. A pretense of gratitude is better than honest ingratitude.
12. The way you behave is more important than the way you really are.
13. Neither parents nor God would survive being offended.
14. The body is something dirty and disgusting.
15. Strong feelings are harmful.
16. Parents are creatures free of drives and guilt.
17. Parents are always right."

DIARY CONTINUED ...